A relationship we can all work on…
I truly believe there isn’t one person in the world that has the ‘perfect’ relationship with money. As I’ve commented on countless times before on the subject, you can be either side of the spectrum of not caring enough about your finances or having too much of an iron vice grip on your pennies. The aim is to be somewhere in the middle, but you will always sway from one side to another throughout your life, depending on your situation.
Currently, I am a little more over to the iron vice grip side of the scale. I am being very careful about our spending at the moment. There are things we want to buy, things we want to save up for and right now, they take priority. I will talk more about my situation, but for now, I really want to share my tips on how to have a better relationship with money.
I’ve never really had the best time with my fiances, but my attitude towards money is changing. It’s taken a while but it’s been worth it. Here are my top tips for gaining a better relationship with your money…
PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR MONEY.
If someone came into your house, you’d greet them and acknowledge their presence. So why don’t we do this with money? If we don’t have the time, we seem to shut it to one side and forget about it. No matter how busy, be conscious of your available balance. It takes five minutes and easily accessible (thank you banking apps). Carve time out to just be aware and give it the time of day. It’s the first step towards having a better relationship with money.
CELEBRATE THE GOOD.
Much like receiving a gold star as a kid, giving yourself a pat on the back about the smallest things makes all the difference. So when you say no to that Starbucks coffee, give yourself that ‘yas queen!’ moment. You deserve to celebrate the smallest of achievements, these are what lead to the huge ones.
AND FORGIVE THE BAD.
There is not one human on this planet who hasn’t made a mistake (you too Mother Teresa). When you make an error with money, don’t flip out and kick yourself to the ground about it. Acknowledge what you’ve done, forgive and move on. This is one small blip in a relationship that lasts a lifetime. It’s not worth spending too much time mopping on.
DON’T BLAME IT FOR EVERY MISTAKE.
We’ve all been there where we’ve looked at our balance and said ‘where did you go?’ It’s so easy to blame the lack of money for all your problems, but at some point, you have to give yourself some tough love. Why do you lack money? Should you be earning more? Should you be spending less. While you shouldn’t be constantly kicking yourself to the ground about your mistakes, if they continue of months and months at a time, you need to realise who is the common factor here- you. It’s time to change your thought process and do something about it.
DON’T LOSE YOURSELF.
This is an important lesson to learn for conscious spending. You need to know exactly how you feel about the different ways your money leaves your account. No one likes money going towards bills but we can accept it for what they bring (phones, water, a roof over our heads). But one gives you a stabbing feeling in your heart and sweaty palms, you need to stop. If you are not conscious of how you feel about your money, your relationship will decline.
HAVE FAITH IN THE LONG TERM VISION.
Your relationship with money will go peaks and troths- it’s seasonal. Sometimes it can be exciting and other times, its quiet. And then there are other times where you just wish it would stop. Having a good relationship with your finances isn’t all rainbows and parades. But you’ve got to love it anyway and accept it for what it is. Also know that those long term goals are not too far off. We’ve given ourselves a timeframe for buying a house in two- two and a half years times. Sounds long but look how quickly this year has gone already. It will all be worth it in the end.
What are your top tips for having a better relationship with money?